The 4 Agreements
1st Agreement: Be Impeccable with Your Word
“Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.”
No more innocent conversations turning confrontational.
No more unwarranted criticism, gossip, blame, or twisted truths to fit someone’s agenda.
No more words spoken with the intention to hurt, punish, shame, or put down.
No more self-criticism, self-loathing, self-doubt, self-punishment, guilt, regret, or feelings of inadequacy.
Much more appreciation, gratitude, uplifting conversations, support, acceptance, compassion, connection, and loyalty.
2nd Agreement: Don’t Take Anything Personally
“Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”
No more feelings hurt by someone’s words or actions.
No more fear that people may react unfairly.
No more need for validation and approval, since other people’s opinions of you are not a reflection of the truth.
No more attachment to changing what other people do or say.
Much more freedom to focus on service and positive impact, since you are no longer burdened by other people’s judgment.
3rd Agreement: Don’t Make Assumptions
“Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.”
No more fear of asking questions that might make you look bad (e.g. fear of asking your supervisor for clarifications regarding expectations).
No more waiting for people to give you want you want, when you haven’t asked them directly because you think they “should know”.
No more worrying, catastrophizing, or attributing bad intentions to people.
No more interpreting innocent actions as attack or disrespect.
No more expecting people to know how things make you feel.
Much more clarity, peace, focus, support, collaboration, employee engagement, and performance.
4th Agreement: Always Do Your Best
“Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.”
No more letting yourself down, feeling regret, frustration, and self-criticism.
No more thinking you should do more or you should do better.
No more beating yourself up when you’re ill, overwhelmed, or depleted.
No more playing small, dreaming small, and making excuses for why you can’t live your best life.
Much more self-compassion, emotional wellness, health, empowerment, productivity, and success.